neverstudied | Victory Road IC Inbox

Mhm.

[He's... faintly disappointed that Egon's not getting it, but not surprised. It's not like he's sure what he'd do if Egon figured out what he was concerned about, anyway. Venkman knows he's being selfish, and probably expecting way too much out of Egon.

Still.]

I'd hope there's a lot of differences between me and your universe's version of me.

[As for Kölliker, Venkman's in his own head too much to even think about the fact that she could be peering in as well.]

[Observing people and their thoughts and emotions is always much more interesting than cleaning up. Not that she'd do anything with the information besides filing it away under the "Interesting" label of her brain, but she's definitely Listening In.

Egon tilts his head, frowning lightly.]

From what I can observe alone, there are a multitude of differences that exist between the two of you. For example, your enthusiasm and interest in trains, as well as your interactions with others, such as your college peers. However, I would still like to do experiments regarding brainwave frequencies and perhaps DNA samples to obtain a comprehensive understanding of these differences.

[He's still quite oblivious and speaking from a purely clinical perspective.]

It's quite interesting how two separate people born under similar, if not identical circumstances, can have such different experiences throughout their lives.

Edited 2019-03-27 16:20 (UTC)

[A bit of the tension leaves Venkman's shoulders as Egon speaks, and Venkman shuffles a little closer to him. After a moment, he tentatively reaches out and clasps Egon's hand in his.]

How do you think the other Venkman would feel? If he showed up here. About this world, about me... about us.

[Still tiptoeing around the actual point, still tentatively trying to get answers for some of his concerns without outright voicing them.]

[Egon mulls these questions over, squeezing Venkman's hand gently. He then weaving his fingers between Venkman's.]

Well, I don't claim to be an expert in human emotional states, but I'd imagine he'd be...bewildered, first and foremost, then complain about the amount of bug-like creatures crawling about. Then, most likely eventually settle if he realized other Ghostbusters in this dimension, or, if he did not realize as such, would attempt to return to his dimension repeatedly. [He pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose.] As for our relationship, he'd probably be surprised and then make a crude remark on dating habits or any sexual topics with juvenile humor.

[And then, after another few seconds of considering this--]

Why?

Yeah, that... that sounds like me.

[Said with a hint of bitterness. Venkman squeezes Egon's hand back, and he visibly tenses again when Egon asks him the question. He answers as nonchalantly as possible.]

Just curious, I guess.

You think he'd be jealous?

[Hmmm. Egon frowns deeper. You're really making him use several hundred brain cells that have probably been neglected for most of his life, designated for "thinking about how other people feel about certain consequences". He doesn't feel great about it, for some reason, but then again, thinking about this stuff was never his forte.

Luckily for Egon, he doesn't have to think about it for too long.]

...I--

[The door creaks open, and Kölliker pushes open the door, still clad in Ray's t-shirt and various other articles of clothing slowly being absorbed into her cytoplasm. Her ears twitch as she stares at them.]

< Dad sad? Weird things? Cake? What's happening? >

[She knows what's going on, and she doesn't want to see her dads sad!]

[this is fake because you're implying egon even has several hundred braincells

Venkman flinches when Ko bursts into the room, and his jaw sets as he realizes that she's been able to sense everything this whole time. Fuck.]

Really wish that tin foil hats worked, right now...

[He doesn't deny what she says, at least. Not that it'd even work if he did.]

< Tin foil makes me stronger! >

[egon has several hundred brain cells, they're all just resting.

Anyways, Kölliker bursting into the room causes Egon to glance over at Venkman, a somewhat confused expression on his face. He takes a moment or two to realize the implications of what she's said.]

Oh.

[There's an awkward pause as he tries to formulate a question.]

Are you...concerned about the fact that I originate from another dimension?

[He's...not quite there.]

[He's trying.

Venkman, meanwhile, kind of wants to disappear right now. Or die.]

It's... the dimensional stuff is a part of it, but it's not about you. Or anything wrong with you.

[He pauses, then moves to grip Venkman's hand with both hands. Egon's a dumbass, but he's not that much of a dumbass. He's worked with and lived with Venkman for over fifteen years.

Well, some version of Venkman. And that therein lies the problem...he thinks.]

About...my dimensional version of Dr. Peter Venkman, then?

< Communication is the essence to successful science! >

[A quote, repeated back in an enthusiastic Egon-like tone by Kölliker. Egon blinks.]

...Yes, um, thank you, Kölliker.

... Yeah.

[God bless Kölliker. Her little quote gets him to laugh, and somehow, that makes it a little easier to keep talking.]

I, uh. I know it's stupid.

[Venkman thinks for a moment, trying to pinpoint what part of this mess he's willing to elaborate on first.]

Half of the stuff you've told me about the other version of me sounds like- well, me. And the other half makes me want to kick his ass. And it kills me to realize how close I am to being the kind of guy who acts like that. If I'm not already.

[Bill Murray Angst TM]

...Ah.

[A puzzled expression appears on Egon's face. Can he not see the logic behind it?]

But the fact that you do not act as such and are worrying about acting as such already separates you from various other dimensional versions of Peter Venkman who would not be under considerable stress at the thought of it. All human beings, given similar circumstances and being placed under stress, are liable to react differently. [A pause.] Such as those ridiculously biased prison psychology experiments.

[Kölliker's still watching them. It's fine, this'll be filed away in her brain as to how to deal with emotional problems in a healthy(?) manner.]

That's kinda what Ray told me, yeah. I know that I'm not gonna spontaneously become an asshole because another version of me is. But still- that's not just some random variation of me out in the multiverse- that's the Venkman you know. Or knew. Or whatever.

And I hate that you have that to compare me to. And I hate that-

[He sighs.]

God, this really isn't fair to you. I know you don't know how to fix my bullshit, and I'm not asking you to.

[Egon idly threads his fingers between Venkman's, racking his brain for solutions to this conundrum. But if Venkman's concerns aren't rooted in logic, it's hard for Egon to come up with a logical response.

Well, not difficult, per se, but not an entirely good response. He tries anyways.]

If it helps, I have not thought about comparing the two of you for the last month or so.

...How long has this been on your mind, exactly?

[Kölliker quickly grows disinterested. They're just sad, have something exciting happen! Maybe she can help somehow? Or spice things up a little, make things fun. She glances around, trying to see if there's anything she can use...

Ah! She picks up the book on trains--the one that Egon gifted Venkman on Valentine's Day--and chucks it as hard as she can at Venkman. This is sure to make this more interesting! Look out!]

It does, a bit. And, uh- this has been on my mind since I found out what your version of Venkman was like, but I've been worried about other stuff, too, basically since you figured out we came from different dimensions.

I-

[Then Venkman gets a book smacked into his chest, and he wheezes, doubling over. After he takes a moment to catch his breath again-]

Feel like I just got hit by a train.

[At least he can still make stupid jokes.]

[The book comes out of nowhere, and Egon jumps a little, staring at Venkman. He tentatively reaches a hand towards Venkman's chest, concerned.]

Are you alright?

[He then casts a confused glance towards Kölliker, who giggles mischievously.]

Kölliker, why on earth would you do that?

[She doesn't answer--at least, not conventionally. She just sends the mental equivalent of ":^)" and then zooms back out of the room. Her job here is done.]

Did you not think to discuss these issues with me before?

It's fine. I probably didn't crack my ribs again. [A beat.] Seriously, though, it just caught me off guard. 'm fine.

[He picks up the book and just kind of. Stares at the cover for a bit.]

... Thought about it, yeah. Didn't want to bother you with a bunch of shit you can't change. Wasn't sure how to bring it up, either.

[Egon glances down towards the book. He clears his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. After a brief pause, he says:]

I, um--I apologize if this is difficult. To talk about. Especially at such a time of night when you are usually in REM sleep.

[Another pause.]

And, ah, I find social situations difficult to navigate. But I greatly value the emotions of all of my partners, even if I cannot say what is meant to be said. [He squeezes Venkman's hand a little tighter.] I hope you understand that.

[Venkman hugs the book to his chest and leans against Egon with a sigh.]

I know, man. And I love you. A lot. [After a pause, he tilts his head up and kisses Egon on the cheek.] Thank you for listening. And, uh, trying to help me deal with... whatever this is.

[Egon runs his hand through Venkman's hair.]

Of course. I love you, as well.

[He pauses. It seems to be getting easier to express this thought out loud, despite the fact he has always struggled to convey such feelings with such imprecise and fickle words. Whether this is an effect of the dimension or the fact that he's able to spend so much time with his partners unabashedly engaging with them...

The thought is interrupted when Kö bursts back through the door, holding an entire box with cake in hand. She picks up a piece in her hand, crushes it, and then pushes it into her "face", allowing it to assimilate into the cytoplasm.]

< Dads better now? >

[Maybe she should throw books at people more often and see what they do. That can be a future experiment.]

[He hums softly, closing his eyes and leaning into the touch, his concerns momentarily forgotten.]

Love when you touch my hair. Feels good.

[Venkman's getting drowsy again.

And then, of course, Ko returns, and he starts, his eyes snapping open.]

... Yeah. Dads're better now, I think.

Does it?

[Hmm. He makes a mental note to do it more often. He ruffles Peter's hair and gently pushes a hand against his chest to encourage him to lie down.]

You should rest. It's late, and you're usually in a bad mood when you don't get at least six hours of uninterrupted sleep.

[Kö continues to stuff her face with cake. Egon scoots to the edge of the bed, then pauses.]

I'm going to put Kölliker back in her containment unit, but I will join you again momentarily. Alright?

Mhhhm.

[Venkman lies back down easily, still cradling the book to his chest. Idly, he wonders if Ko knew exactly what she was doing when she chose to throw this book at him. Probably.

They really do grow up so fast.

By the time Egon comes back, Venkman's already beginning to nod off again, his face in a pillow and the book on the nightstand.]

[Egon walks to the other room where he left the PokéBall. Kölliker willingly goes back into her containment unit, though Egon first has to prompt her to take off Ray's clothes and put them back where she found them. When he comes back, he's put on his pajamas. He carefully closes the door behind him and wanders over to his partner. Spengler brushes a stray hair from the man's face and plants a gentle kiss on his forehead before making his way to the other side of the bed.

He sits on the edge of the bed and inches towards Venkman before lying down next to him, wrapping an arm around his chest and burying his head in the space between Venkman's neck and shoulder. He doesn't exactly sleep the same amount as his partners, but that doesn't mean he won't sleep with them. Being awake leaves plenty of time to think, and that conversation has given him plenty to think about.

At this moment, however, his thoughts are clouded with only one subject, and that is how much love and adoration he feels for his partners in this dimension. He threads his free hand through Venkman's hair again, gently ruffling it and observing how it falls across his head.

The night is quiet.]

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